Does he know?

Selene and I met almost after a decade; it was a bitter sweet moment for us. A lot changed since then, and a lot had not. What had changed was Selene was now married and had a beautiful year old baby, what had not changed was she was still Lavin’s girlfriend. Lavin is my best friend, we grew up together, and had been together ever since. We had seen each other through each and every phase of life. Every festival and special occasion we would celebrate together. I was the only one who knew about his countless affairs, his fascination towards the colour tangerine or how he secretly wanted to become a ballet dancer, and he was the only one who knew I aspired to be in the Army (unfortunately me eyesight issues didn’t make me eligible for it!), wanted to ride a Royal Enfield and though I was a disaster in Mathematics, that subject made me feel secure! (I am a Maths professor now!). This is how close we are and were!

After completing High School, I opted for Bachelor of Science and Lavin for Engineering, and he shifted his base to a different city! For the first time in 20 years I felt so lost without my best friend! I missed him a lot, but he was busy adjusting to his new life and environment out there, it didn’t leave him much time to interact with his family or me. We too started drifting apart and we had our new circle of friends, and there in his college he met the love of his life Anunaya. She was not an exquisite looking girl, but she was pretty in her own ways. With a flawless caramel colour skin, oval face, hazel eyes with bud shaped lips, silky straight hair, slightly crooked nose and a throaty laugh. The day Lavin saw her he fell in love with her, but never had the courage to talk. But he did what most engineering guys do, stalk! But not talk. He found out everything about her, her favourite colour, music, cuisine, you  name it, he had even made a diary dedicated solely to her, where he wrote everything he felt about her or what she did the whole day. On the other hand Anunaya did not know Lavin existed on this planet and was blissfully unaware that there was a boy in her class who doted on her.

One day at their college fest Anunaya won a dance competition, for the first time Lavin mustered all the courage he had and went to congratulate her, he extended his hands with sweaty palms due to nervousness towards her to congratulate her, but his hands instead of meeting her hands met with her boyfriend, who was also her classmate, putting an abrupt end to his one sided love story. Lavin was devastated how he could not find out about her boyfriend, when he could find out everything else! It took him a long time to come out of this heartbreak, and to help him out of this were his 2 closest friends in college Yussef and Selene. If you are wondering where I was all this while, to be honest I was nowhere, I was dealing my own things then!

Lavin,Yussef and Selene were the inseparable trio since the first week of their college, they found solace among each other, and a home away from in each other’s company. They would attend lectures, watch movies, eat all the time together, the only time they separated from each other was when they had to retire for the day and go back to their houses. Selene was a tomboy; she used to ride an Avenger, was a national level basket ball player and had a heart of gold. The best part about her was she was unapologetic about the way she was.  She had a dusky skin, tall, coarse short hair, heavily kohled eyes and shrill voice. Exact opposite to Anunaya but the most lovable person I have met in my whole life!

Selene loved Lavin, but she gave him his space and time to recuperate from the heart break and would always lend him her shoulder to cry on.  Two months had passed, Lavin was still mourning over Anunaya, that’s when Selene decided enough was enough. As they stood near the corner of her house one fine evening to smoke their favourite Marlboro Lights, she sombrely looked up to him and said “Don’t you think it’s enough?”, he gave her a confused look, as he wasn’t sure what she was talking about! She went ahead and kissed him, he was too shocked to respond and moved away from her; she did not regret her action but was sure that their friendship had ended. Lavin was blank about the whole scenario and we spoke for hours for the first time since he had shifted.

Having not spoken for a week, Lavin missed her. He missed her company, her jokes, he was so use to her presence, which he had taken for granted. He went searching for her and found her smoking along with Yussef at the smoking joint near her house, the same place where she had kissed him! He looked sheepishly smiled at her, and Yussef decided to leave them alone, as he knew there was a friendship at stake. Lavin tried to use the tried and tested lines, that almost girl who has been dumped or rejected in her life has heard, about how amazing she is, and how she was always a dear friend. Selene was in no mood for all these talks, she simply told him “If you want to be with me, be there as my boyfriend, I cant be in love with you, and act as a friend, I cant!”. Lavin was too scared to lose a friend, so he proposed to her then and there, and that is how they started dating!

When Lavin started dating her, his and my phone call frequencies increased! I spoke to Selene and we hit off instantly! Lavin wasn’t in love with her at the beginning, He knew it, she knew it and I knew it, but that was something we never discussed, Lavin was too scared to lose a friend, She was optimistic that one day he will come around, and I hoped for both their sake that this is just a passing affair! But as time went by, it was Selene who proved to be right, her patience paid off, and slowly Lavin started falling in love with her. He was elated being with her, and they spent most of their  time together. They would get away on weekends to small romantic getaways. Lavin’s parents were not that well to do, it would  be generally Selene who would be sponsoring the trips, he would save up money from his monthly allowance so he could buy her something nice every month, so it was almost a perfect love story. Lavin, Selene, Youssef and I would visit each other often and had a blast, which meant them bearing with my loud laughter and being thrown out from 3 hotels and cafes!!! I have created some of my best memories with them!

Selene and Lavin were made for each other, when Lavin got hit by a bus, and was admitted in the hospital for a week, Selene did not leave his side for a minute, when Selene lost her grandmother, to whom she was very close, he went along to her native even if that meant missing his exam and failing in his papers. Both their families knew about them, but only as each other’s best friends. But like all good things, there college years came to an end, no one realised how these 4 wonderful years passed, but it was time to decide on their future, Selene wanted to get married immediately after their graduation, but Lavin wanted to focus on his career, as he had a lot of family responsibilities, he had lost his father at a very early age, and his mother was a home maker. No matter how heart wrenching it was they decided to part ways. But a heart wants what it wants, no matter how much they decided to stay apart; they would meet each other and break down.  But it was clear that their relation had no future.

Eventually through a dating website Selene met a lovely boy named Raguel. He was an hotelier and an orphan; he had single handed taken care of his 3 sisters and settled them. Selene found him to be an excellent human being and within 3 months of talking to each other they decided to get married. Selene’s parents were against this match as he had no credentials, but Selene was adamant to get married to him. She was desperate to start her life afresh, hence the only way she knew her parents would agree to this match if Lavin spoke to them, as in the past he had bailed her from a lot many troublesome situations. Lavin spoke to Raguel, and then convinced her parents to get her married to Raguel.

Raguel found Selene and Lavin to be very awkward around each other but he never commented, they would often hang out together and have a gala time! Soon the D day came when Selene and Raguel were to get married, it was a grand affair and Lavin danced maximum at her wedding, but at the end he broke down when she left with Raguel, everyone thought he would miss his friend, but it was only him and Selene who knew the fact!

Selene tried to be happy in her new life, and tried to adjust to the maximum, in the mean time Lavin also had got a job, and tried to focus there and move on, by talking to other girls and going out on dates, but nothing really worked out, as back of the mind it was only Selene who occupied his mind. Selene adjusted a lot, and thought it would be a fresh start, but somewhere even Lavin occupied her mind, they would occasionally talk on the phone, when Raguel was not around, and eventually their relationship continued like it was during their college days. I was against their relationship, hence I decided to cut my contacts with her, and maintained minimum contact with Lavin. Occasionally when Lavin would call up he would give me updates about Selene, irrespective of whether I asked or not, I remember this particular day he was quite upset with Selene, as she had consummated her marriage. He did not speak to her  for a month. Things again started coming back to normal with them.

Two  year ago, I got the news that Selene was pregnant with twins, I thought maybe finally she had settled everything with her husband, but was informed it was through IVF, which made me question her a little, as she was too young  for IVF and had no medical condition that I knew off, but again it was their prerogative.  The pregnancy was not an easy one, there were some complications and she lost one of the babies in the womb, we all were praying for her and she finally gave birth to a lovely baby boy and named him Joshua. Lavin became the godfather for the child, as they thought it was because of Lavin; Selene and Raguel got married to each other. That was the last time I had heard about her.

Coming back to the present, I was in the hospital where my mother had got admitted for a heart surgery; Lavin’s family was a huge support to us. Lavin is working abroad, hence he could not make it, and in the evening during visiting hours I suddenly saw Selene walking in, smiling at me with a big bag of goodies and fruits for my mother. I froze looking at her; there was a rush of emotions and memories at the same time. She came and hugged me tight. I was half worried, half relieved and i don’t even remember the other plethora of emotions I was going through that time. After she met my mother and spent a good enough time with her, we sat chatting, I asked her about Joshua and how was he doing, she said he was doing great, and showed me his photograph, she smiled and asked me “who does he look like?”, I said “Definitely not like Raguel, but bit like you”, she laughed and asked me to take a closer look at the photograph carefully and who does his features match with? I was shocked to see an uncanny resemblance with Lavin!

My throat got parched that moment and all I could croak was “Does he know?”, she smiled and as she was about to give me the answer, her husband came  to pick her up...